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FitBit

16 Jul

so I got a Fitbit through my works wellness program. I’m pretty excited. Why you ask?  Because now that I have a Fitbit I will automatically start shedding more body fat.  It’s that simple. It has this internal fat bhen you have it on your wrist.  You don’t even need to move.  You just wear it and lose inches.  I can feel my fat melting when I wear it. You should all go out and get one.

it really folks, Fitbit is doing good things for those that are hungry.  So get one and get your sweat on.

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Pictures

12 Jul

its amazing how I feel so revved and energized but I don’t feel like I’m losing weight.  I feel great when I leave the house.  I think “damn I am one hot mama!”  I then walk by a window or mirror  and want to puke. I’m all sorts of jiggly fluffy ew!  I decided to take a picture in the same position throughout my little journey. I put them together and bam!  I have lost weight. I don’t look like I’m 5 weeks over due to give birth.  Yes people always asked me when I was due. I tell you, that is such a confidence booster.  Sometimes I would reply excitedly “I’m pregnant????  I didn’t even know!!!”  So I put the pictures together and wow.  I have lost weight, but not only that inches.  I am not even close to being done, but it boosts my spirits enough to not give up.  So here is 39 days of progress.  Enjoy. 😉

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When Life knocks you down

31 May

I haven’t blogged in a very long time. That must be why I gained weight. I mean, blogging has no calories.

About a month ago life hit me in the face and knocked me down. It was a terrible realization. I was literally losing everything at once. This particular thing was not my fault, but I know I had many faults leading up to this day.  I was depressed and broken. I turned my head to the Heavens and just prayed. Thankful for my friends and family I was able to pick myself up. That was no easy feet. I’m a big chunk a monk. My weight started dropping. It was a dramatic unfortunate way to drop weight. I decided if my body was going to expel nastiness I would help it. I started moving. I’m a pretty lazy person. I’m not proud of that. I won’t brag too much about it, but I could win an award for laziness.  I start walking.  A little one day a lot the next. I decided I will not walk less than 2 miles every day.  I have energy for the first time in years. I’ve shed about 20 pounds in the last month. I am ready to shed another 20 or 200. I am ready to live!  I can’t imagine doing this without Jesus. I think things would have been so much worse had I not known Him.   He has carried me and I have given it all up to Him. Here’s to many more wonderful days, weeks, and years!  Cheers!   

Tips for immediate weight loss: second edition

23 Sep

First we are going to talk about the scale. Some people say ‘don’t worry about the scale, it’s all about measurements.’ Well I will get to measurements in a moment. I can’t stress enough how important the scale is. The very first thing you want to do is pick up your scale (that’s exercise in itself). Once you’ve picked up the scale just have a good yell. This will convert the number in the scale to suit your wants. Once you’ve had a good yell you will immediately be able to wear skinny jeans and look great.

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Once you’ve gotten the yelling out, you’ll want to slowly, but swiftly, move the scale into one arm. It doesn’t matter which arm. You need to put on the cheesiest smile ever. Don’t worry the cheesy smile is not dairy. Once you’ve done that you will be down 10 pounds. 10 POUNDS. WOW, amazing right? I guarantee you will be slipping into that slinky black dress that’s been sitting in your closet since your senior prom.
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The next step is to sit on your scale. It’s imperative that you make a shhhh sign with your finger. Just have a nice rest. It will tighten your glutes so tight. You will have the lower body of a model. You will even gain some height. It’s crazy, but it works. Believe me! I am an expert on this.
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The next big thing for weight loss is the measuring tape. It is really important. Measurements show the real progress. So tying in with the scale and measurements you’ll want to tightly wrap the measuring tape around your scale. Man I can’t even tell you the instant results you’ll get from this. Let me just say it’s amazing!
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A lot of health gurus out there say to measure your food. I agree, do it!!! Measuring your food will give you the right amount of nutrition. I’m not sure the what the science behind it is, but it works.
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Also measuring your food and looking at it from behind in a blurry way helps too.
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One last tip. Eating out. Eating out can be difficult when you want to lose weight. Well have I got the solution for you. You grab a friend (they have to be fit) and head to your local fast food chain. You order your pile of fat/cholesterol filled, preservative laden food. The next part is tricky. You need to find a white room where you can snap a quick pic. Once you’ve found that you get out your trusty measuring tape. Wrap the tape around your meal and have your fit friend hold it. Snap a picture. With this tip you can eat what you want and not worry about the ickyness of the food. The food will magically turn into fruit and veggies. See previous pics.
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I hope these tips were helpful to you. If you have any other tips, please leave them in the comments. Happy day!

Starting over

20 Sep

I haven’t blogged in a while. It’s funny I stop blogging and gain weight. So I have come to the conclusion that blogging =weight loss. Sounds about right. I’m sick of being the fat one. I’m sick of being tired. So about two weeks ago I decided to make a change, a lifestyle change. The first few days were awful. I was withdrawing from sugar, and man oh man that’s rough. I was grumpy and hangry. But that only lasted about three days. Thank God. I’m sure my family rejoiced that first day I wasn’t the wicked witch of the west.
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I started debolting boards for a friend at his warehouse. Holy moly that was a workout. Even my finger muscles are screaming. But it sure gets my sweat on. I am like a crazy mad woman doing it. I guess my calling is construction. :sigh. I was really hoping my calling would be healer or librarian. Nope, I’m meant for physical labor. At least I found something I’m good at. My co-workers make me board though.

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So I have made some good progress in the last 15 days, 9 pounds gone and more to go. Goodbye forever!
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Sandy Hook

18 Dec

In light of this horrific tragedy that took place on the morning of December 14, in a quaint CT town, I will write about that.
A very sick young man took the lives of twenty children, and eight adults, himself included. It shocked the World. Before the families of the deceased even knew if their children were gone, the Internet exploded with EVERYONE’S opinions on this shooting. Gun laws should be changed, some said. Others said guns should be illegal. But what really needs to happen first, mourn the victims, pray for all involved, helping this small town to recover as best as it can. We then need to look into what our country has to offer for mental health care. Mental health care in our country can be almost non-existent to those without insurance. And for those with insurance, there may be run arounds. Many times mentally ill people will be handed a prescription, and that is it. While prescriptions are helpful, there needs to be a continuing plan that includes therapy. Medications will not help people work through the feelings they have. I am not saying every mentally ill person will shoot out a school, because that is just not the case. But there are the few who do have violent tendencies and sometimes through no fault of there own. They are ill, some hear voices. I have personal experience with this. My second cousin suffers many mental ailments, and she heard voices. They told her to do harm to herself. Luckily, she expressed this, and she was able to get help. But had she just let the voices control her, she would not be here today. She is not a normal case though. She is basically a child of the state. She has 24 hour supervision. Most people who are mentally ill do not. So instead of arguing on social networks about gun control, which will do no good, be proactive. Research, write to our “government”, help those who need it. We need to have mental health care available to everyone. But debating all this on social networks won’t do a damn thing. You need to actually get off your computer and do something.
I challenge you all to do something nice for someone. It does not matter what, just a nice gesture. A smile, a quick hello, holding the door. It can be anything, it may seem small to you, but it could mean the world to the person.
“Never worry about numbers. Help one person at a time, and always start with the person nearest you”. ~Mother Teresa

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1 Timothy 6:11 NIV …pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness.

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Blubbery and jiggly

6 Dec

So my back went out a month ago. I stopped insanity to let it recover, I got out of the routine of working out. My back got better, I still didn’t work out. I feel like total poo. My muscles have turned from rock hard to jello like. I’m like the Michelin man. All rolly and nasty. My face looks like a melted marshmallow. So I decided to get back into my routine. I woke up ready to go, and wouldn’t you know, my flippin’ back was out. So in four weeks I have turned into a big ball of mashed taters. How discouraging. So I will be back!!!! Seriously, everything stems from being a fat ass. So I am going to fix my back, and go go gadget. Stay tuned for some more insanity updates once I get my bulging discs to un bulge, so I can unbulge myself.

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